You were never alone
by ExquisiteInsanity
Summary: Ilia feels very alone.


Ilia sat down on a rock beside the spring, sighing and looking over the grassy landscape of Ordon. She had nothing to do, no purpose. She was the Mayor's daughter, there should be something she could do! But of course, her father wouldn't allow that... He barely allows her to do anything on her own.

She just wanted something to do, something to say, something to make her feel loved, needed, _wanted_. There's nothing important to do, she can't even pet Epona what with Link away.

She looked up, watching the clouds move throughout the blue sky.

"I wish I didn't always feel so alone... I wish I had someone, anyone, to help me. I just feel so outcast here..." she murmured.

"This isn't a home for me. This is not my home. You feel like you belong at your home, you're happy, you have a purpose. You aren't worthless, pointless, and depressed every second of every day. I don't belong in Ordon, and I don't want to be here!" Ilia continued, with more anger and conviction than before.

_Why did this ever even happen..? _Ilia thought, a tear rolling down her cheek. She only wants to feel loved, to feel wanted, to feel as though she has a purpose... Is that too much to ask? She supposes so, as it has never come true. No one ever would care for her, for any reason.

Ilia dug her fingernails into her palm, feeling anger rush through her again. Why? Why did no one care for her? Why didn't she have a purpose? There was just no room for Ilia in Ordon, this she knew. Tears were know cascading down her face and she buried her head in her arms, sobbing, as she collapsed back onto the ground. She hadn't realized she had gotten up.

If she had someone, anyone, to tell about her problems If she had a way of venting. If only she had a trustworthy friend, someone who she could tell about her problems and fears, she wouldn't have a reason to cry. At least, not as many. It would be so different. It would be so much better...

_Please, someone, anyone, help me find something to make me feel needed. Wanted. to make me feel at home here. Because, as it is, I'll just be suffering all my life... _Ilia thought.

_How could I let it get this far? _Ilia wondered. _I am such an idiot..._ Ilia couldn't deal with this much longer. She couldn't cope with all of the pain, the suffering. She just felt so terrible about herself, all of the time. She wasn't used to this, but she was. She wasn't _supposed_ to be used to this, though. That she knew. Ilia was the mayor's daughter, after all. No one would ever guess that she suffered from severe depression - Ilia didn't even really know, herself. Ilia doesn't really pay much attention to _why _she feels the way she does - honestly, she couldn't care less. It was _what _she felt that mattered to her. Not why.

With even more tears falling than before, Ilia hung her head, staring at her pale reflection in the water. She frowned at her puffy eyes, red tear-stained cheeks and decided she didn't want to see herself. She looked up to the sky. Ilia wanted to start her life over, and do things to make her feel better about herself. But... it was impossible, she knew. There was nothing for her...

Ilia stood, and looked to the gate of the spring. Link was walking into the clearing with Epona at his side. She lost her balance, surprised, and fell down.

He smiled at her and walked towards her, holding out a hand to help her up. She felt happiness surge through her, spreading within her so suddenly she almost jumped. She took his hand and stood.

"What's wrong, Ilia? Have you been crying?" Link asked her, concerned. His words made Ilia so happy to be alive.

"Yes, I was, but it's fine. Nothing's wrong... really." She added, seeing his disbelieving expression.

"No. Tell me what's wrong. You don't have to say all of it, just part. Just tell me why you're so upset. You're worrying me, Ilia," Link told her.

Ilia's breath sped up. _What? He was worried about me? Why would anybody be worried? _

Seeing sincerity in his eyes, Ilia sighed and told him why.

"I just feel so alone. I don't have a purpose, I'm unwanted and I'm unneeded. I'm just so sad all the time, and there's nothing good about me. I'm stupid, and ugly, and just... disgusting. Horrible. I don't understand how people can even bear to look at me. I surely can't, I hate myself. I don't want to bother anyone. I don't want to be at Ordon. You're wanted in a home, right? You have a purpose. I have nothing. I am nothing. No one needs me, or cares about me, not even myself."

Link's eyes widened at her talk of self loathing and how much she hated herself. _Could someone really feel this way? __I mean, sure, I do sometimes, but not always. And it isn't this bad..._ Link thought.

"Ilia..." Link said. "You're a beautiful person, on the inside and the outside. You're perfect. You're nice, and funny, and sweet, and pretty. You're wanted. I don't know about the rest of them, but Collin, Fado, and I certainly want you in our lives. Your father, too. I need you Ilia... Do I count?"

Ilia hugged Link, and didn't let go for a while.

Link stood, and brought Ilia up with him. She hadn't realized they had sat down.

"You were never alone," Link said to Ilia, as the three of them (Ilia, Link, and Epona) walked out of the gate to the spring.

They got to Link's house, but kept walking. When they were inside of the village, Link hugged Ilia again.

"Welcome home," he said quietly into her ear.

Ilia made her way home, thinking about everything that Link had said. She's thankful, in a way, that it had gotten that. That she had been that sad and depressed. She was better, though, at least for the moment. And she knew, that as long as she had Link, she would stay that way.

Ilia made it to her bedroom, and sat down on her bed, wiping tear stained cheeks and puffy, bloodshot eyes.

Ilia smiled a little to herself. She came to terms with her feelings today, when Link had shown up.

Ilia loved Link. She loved him with all her heart. And whether or not she pursued this feeling, and whether or not he returned the feelings, she knew that her love for him and their friendship would keep her going for as long as she lived.


End file.
